Why I like my scars!
A scar is a mark left on the skin after a surface injury or
wound has healed. 2. A lingering sign of
damage or injury, either emotional,
mental or physical. (freedictionary.com)
I’ll
be honest the picture isn’t me. I do
have a scar in that general area and if I open my shirt for the world to see,
you will a few scars. One scar is from the portal I had inserted in order to
make it easier for the medical personal to draw blood, insert medicine and
attach my chemo lines. The next scar
goes from the center of my chest to under my arm. Go a little further down and
there are my stretch marks from two pregnancies, scar from a C-section and epidural
cut.
On
the back of my hands and wrist are scars from a student I held in a restraint
who scratched very deeply. My arms and legs are covered with scars from various
childhood, teenage and adult injuries. Some are long, some are narrow, some
white, some are so old that only I can see them. Finally, some I don’t look at
because those scars go all the way to my heart and soul.
From now on let no one
trouble me [by making it necessary for me to justify my authority as an
apostle, and the absolute truth of the gospel], for I bear on my body the
branding-marks of Jesus [the wounds, scars, and other outward
evidence of persecutions—these testify to His ownership of me].
These physical scars are the result
of life happening to me. The scars are
the reminders of a high risk pregnancy, a scary first pregnancy, a trip when I
was hurt the most and scared I wouldn’t live through it. These are my branding marks of Jesus; they
testify to Jesus’ ownership of me. A time to remember that no mater what, God
was there and put a hedge of protection around me and I am here to testify to
that.
There
are mental scars:
·
You won’t pass the test, you aren’t smart enough
·
You are a basic teacher; we won’t be renewing
your contract.
·
We don’t want you teaching anymore in that class
·
The writing, well, it isn’t up to our standards
The emotional
scars:
·
I hate you, I wish you weren’t my mother
·
I wish you were dead
·
Don’t talk to me, you are . . ..
·
The friends who no longer are or will become . . .
because the scar is just to fresh from the last time
The scars that
can’t be seen are the ones that hurt the most.
When I look back at them I see how God stitched the wounds together that
those words, situations, experiences produced. I wish I could say that I just
moved on and they don’t hurt anymore, but no.
You see I have to
forgive the person who said it, forgive the situation that caused it and
forgive the person I was at the time. That
is the hardest part, but each time, I can forgive because I know that there is
a great purpose> Not my will by your will God
Then Satan comes
along and replays the situation in my head, whispering remember.
Then God brings me to another situation that is more hurtful
and I remember that the test isn’t over yet.
Why?
Trust in and rely
confidently on the Lord with
all your heart And do not rely on your
own insight or understanding. In all your ways
know and acknowledge and recognize Him, And
He will make your paths straight and smooth
[removing obstacles that block your way].
We are in a spiritual warfare, the
past is over and God is fighting behind the scene:
For though we walk in the
flesh [as mortal men], we are not carrying on our [spiritual] warfare according
to the flesh and using the weapons of man.
The scars?
The Emotional, Physical, Mental ones?
They remind us that God brought us through
once and he will bring us through again.
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